3 Things Jon Gosseling Should Avoid - 3 Tips For Dads In Divorce

By Jason Roberts

No one likes to go through a divorce, that goes without saying. Unfortunately, 40% of all marriages in the U.S. end in divorce as of 2008. That means 4 out of 10 homes will be broken ones, Jon and Kate being one of them. This takes a heavy toll on the entire family; man, woman, and children. Sometimes, despite the best efforts of the husband and wife to resolve their differences, divorce becomes inevitable. While the woman does suffer, sometimes greatly, it is the man who's suffering is overlooked. Women, on average, come out in better condition after divorce proceedings are over. Men, on the other hand are left to deal with alimony, asset redistribution, child support, custody troubles, depression, and blood-sucking lawyers, often without any support of their own. While Jon's divorce is different from others, there are a few things all fathers can do to come out better.

The first thing you want to do is prepare mentally. Whether you expect a clean or dirty fight from your spouse, you should still prepare for the worst. Prepare mentally by defining what you feel you are properly entitled to and hold your ground. Prepare for high emotions, tension, stress, and heated exchanges. Perhaps the most effective thing you can do is to help yourself is to find a support group or a good friend that you can share your feelings with. Statistics have shown that male divorcees were up to 6 times more likely to have depression. You should also prepare for an unfair court battle, case in point Kramer vs. Kramer. The courts almost always favor a competent mother to a competent father.

The second thing you want to do is prepare financially and legally. It's very important you find proper legal counsel, preferably one that is referred to you and who will go to the trenches for you, and set aside money for your defense. If you have skeletons in your closet, prepare to deal with them with your counselor, don't go on public and admit to an affair (not very wise on Jon's part). Also, you might want to keep an organized and clear journal to present in your defense. Fill it with videos, photos, receipts, times, places and events, and show it to your lawyer. It's also very important that you start lining up credible witness that will vouch for you.

Financially, you should cancel joint credit cards, or risk paying her debts in addition to yours. Take an inventory of all your assets and debts and make photo copies of important documents, e.g. bank statements, pay stubs, tax returns, etc. Go back at least three years.

The third thing to do is take care of your children. By this I mean, realize that, depending on age or maturity, this will be a turbulent time for them. Whether you have 1 or 8 kids, make it clear that despite the divorce, you are still there for them. Try to keep your relationship between you and your kids untouched by your marital troubles. Play more with them, attend kids parties, play dates, social functions, etc. You might also want to consider a enrolling your kids in counseling if you see it necessary. And do not, play them against their mother. Be the best father you can be.

While Jon is at a disadvantage with all the exposure and having a soon-to-be-ex who filled for divorce first (that Kate has really got her stuff together), you could learn from his mistakes. Just be more careful.

Your goal shouldn't be to destroy your spouse and take everything, just take what is rightfully yours; fatherhood and integrity. - 30692

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The Lord Works In Mysterious Ways!

By L.J. James

There once was a young couple who lived in a beautiful town. They had the best of everything. Their love was strong and real. When their first child was born she was the most beautiful child they had ever seen.The couple believed their life to be perfect.

One day when their Daughter was about seven years old the Couple was in a car crash.Checking his wife right away the husband was relived to see she was ok. They both had received only a few scratches.They turned to check on their young daughter and as soon as they saw her both of them burst into tears.The wife started screaming NO GOD ! PLEASE GOD NO ! Their pain was felt by anyone and everyone who happened to be around them that day. The Beautiful young child had passed on and left this world .

During the funeral the deceased child's mother kept asking why ? Why my child? oh dear Lord why? People paying there respects to this wonderful couples most beautiful child tried to console her. They told her things like "It is the Lords will" and "She is in Heaven now" These things did not help the child's Mother and she cursed God Saying to the People "There is no God" for if there was such a God how could he allow something so terrible to happen? Surely he would have saved my child and she would still be here with us!!

Years passed by as they always do and the pain this Couple felt started to ease. They had more children over the years, all very beautiful None quite as beautiful as their first one.Their life went back to being as close to perfect as can be.But Every time the women heard something bad had happened in the world it reinforced her belief that there was no God and no Heaven up above,For surely no God would allow such terrible things to happen in this world !!!

One day as the Woman was walking to the store she heard these screams "NO LORD PLEASE LORD NO" The tone of the screams took her back to the death of her child and she ran toward the sound of them. She saw the woman who was screaming and behind her she could see a building on fire, My Child is in there Screamed the woman! Pointing to the building engulfed in flames. Knowing the pain this woman would go threw and not wishing it on anyone she raced into the building. Flames shot at her and she could feel them burning her but the pain was some where else and did not hurt her .As the flames got larger and the heat got much hotter the woman thought this is what hell must be like! Then she thought but there is no hell for if there is No God and No Heaven then there can't be a Hell can there? These thoughts passed threw the woman's mind as she felt herself begin to grow tired.

As She felt herself about to pass out the Women saw a child in the distance and with new found strength she started walking towards the child. As she got closer she could see it was the most beautiful young girl she had ever seen . When she reached the child the child spoke hello mother it is I your Daughter the one killed in that car accident those many years ago. No the Woman said you are gone your Dead. Dead yes I may be Mother but gone no I have never left you .I have always been in your heart and you in mine. But I am with the Father now in the most Wonderful Kingdom imaginable. With who? asked the Woman , The Father God answered the child the one you denounced upon my death. No said the woman there can't be a GOD or a heaven For surely no God would allow the Terrible things to Happen that happen upon this earth. Terrible things are done by terrible people answered the child and they will answer for their sins in the afterlife have no fear of that my Mother, The Lord will see that justice is done.

But what of you asked the Mother you where not taken from me by a terrible person it was an accident why did the Lord take you from me. The Child smiled at her Mother and spoke Mother what you see as the most terrible thing ever is not. For I am in the Kingdom of the Lord and there is no greater reward then that ! My life on Earth was short Mother, I agree with you on that but Mother let me let you in on a little secret "All life on Earth is short" It is just a blink of the eye to the Father. Miss me Mother for I know you always will, But have faith in the Father for if you believe in him and follow his words you will be with me again one day and then you will feel no pain or sorrow ever again. The Mother reached down picked up her child closing her eyes and hugging the child to her bosom, She heard a voice that was not her Daughters say "I will always Love you my Child"

The woman opened her eyes and she saw lights and heard sirens and the voices of many people. Not sure what was going on she looked down at her child only to see that she was not holding her child but a small young boy. The Woman who she had seen screaming was grabbing for this child saying Thank you oh thank you Lord for sending this Woman to rescue my Child ,In my heart Lord I always knew you would save him, for surely you would never allow something so terrible to happen !!!!

By L.J. James AmericanBikerX.com - 30692

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Gifts for Fathers

By Pamela Finley

Fathers are often some of the hardest people to shop for. They often don't open up about what thier wants are. Too often we end up getting Dad a tie that looks just like the one we got last year and/or the handkerchief that looks just like the one we got last year. However with a little thought and planning we can find a gift that will put a GENUINE smile on his face and avoid the same run of the mill gifts he has too many to count.

First you have to know the person you're buying the gift for. This makes sense, because you wouldn't usually buy a gift for someone you don't know and of course if its your Dad, it seems only natural that you would know him. However, often its not that simple. Many of our fathers work long hours and have to go on company trips. Then on top of that, if your father is the strong silent type he may be hard to talk to even when he is at home. Dads may also be quiet about expressing what they want because they're the provider and are not used to being the one asking others to get things for them. If your father falls into one of these categories, try observing his surroundings instead of just asking what he wants. Is he working in out in his garage or shop all the time? Try buying that perfect tool to help him with his projects. Is he surrounded by his gadgets? Try finding a useful piece of electronics to simplify his life. Is he the investment banker type? Try finding a stylish money clip or nice dress shoes to go with his business suits. Whatever his interests are you can learn a lot about your dad or husband just by paying attention to his habits.

Once you have an idea of what type of gift to get, then you can start shopping. Start out with a broad website that can link you to other websites with more specific categories. Then once you've found a related website take your time to look through the various products and select the best option for your dad.

To save time, try shopping at an online store that specializes in gifts for fathers. By limiting your search you can keep yourself from having to wade through pages of products for women and children. Websites that specializes in Fathers day gifts are a great place to find gifts for Dad for any occasion.

Some fathers can be complicated to find gifts for. On the one hand they normally will be happy with whatever gift you get them but on the other hand it's sometimes difficult to get that very enthusiastic response that you're wishing for when buying a gift. If you follow the tips above you'll have a better chance of finding those gifts that will really wow your special dad, whether fathers day gifts, birthday gifts or gifts for this holiday season. - 30692

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How to Teach Children Right From Wrong

By Dr. Noel Swanson

"My 5 year old has just started school. Before school she was always polite, caring, helpful. Since going to school, while she still appears to be so with her teachers (so they say), she now really pushes the boundaries at home. Some kids at school have taught her to swear, talk back, talk about sex in very broad terms. She talks back and while fundamentally she is still a wonderful and very smart little girl, her smarts have turned into "smarty-pants".

I am not sure how I should teach her to make the right choices about right vs. wrong. She has already skipped school at the urging of her 5 year old friend. How can I help her when she is out of my supervision at school? How do I instruct to make the right decision on her own?

That is a great question. First we should discuss the fundamentals regarding this issue.

Kids in general try hard to do well in life. Their behaviors reflect what they think will bring them a successful result. The problem is that their idea of a successful result might not be the best idea. Sometimes they want the basics like hunger, warmth, and food. Or they might strive to have their parent's approval and love. Or they might be out to just have a good time.

They will demonstrate the behavior they believe will get them the need they have at that time.

Of course, not all behaviors are successful - and that is the whole learning process. Constantly through life we are experimenting with behaviors to find the ones that work best for us. In choosing what behaviors to experiment with, we take input from past experiences, from what we have been told, and from what we have seen others do (in real life and on TV) and we combine this with the skills, abilities, and personality that we have. From all of this we get a range of possible behaviors, and out of those we pick what we hope will serve us best.

After experimenting we will find the behaviors that meet our needs. We will use these behaviors to get what we want. The more we achieve a good result with a behavior, the more we demonstrate that behavior.

Returning to your 5 year old daughter. This behavior is a sign that she is in the process of experimenting. She is in a new situation at school and this has expanded her world. She is not sure how to react and is excited and nervous at the same time. She is testing different behaviors to determine which behaviors will end in an intended result.

Many of these behaviors, once tried, will be abandoned. Some will be kept, and incorporated into her normal lifestyle. Which will they be? That depends on what outcomes she experiences. At this age the approval of parents is pretty important, so your response to them will certainly be an influence. But so too will be outside influences, such as explicit rewards or punishments, the approval of teachers and, of course, her friends.

You have a great deal of influence as her parent. When she is this young she will listen to you. Later on is another story. Your influence appears in two ways.

1. How you respond emotionally to her behaviors. Do you approve or disapprove of her behaviors?

2. Your control of external factors. You can decide what school she goes to, and the types of people she will meet at school and in your neighborhood. You can also impose rewards, punishments, and constraints (such as permissions to do or not do activities).

Weaving what he discussed together and looking at this strategically, you need to answer the following questions:

Does this look like it is just an experimental phase that will almost certainly pass? If so, then don't get too stressed about it all - enjoy the phase of watching your kids growing up and exploring the world. (Hey, I remember sneaking out from home at about 7 to go and play in the school playground, in the dark, at about 9pm. I even put pillows in my bed to deceive my parents. And I turned out okay ... I think...)

Bear in mind that if you over-react to things like her swearing that may, in itself, actually make the behavior seems MORE exciting rather than less. Generally, "chilling out" is the better way to go.

If you think that her bad behavior is escalating too much then you need to do something to thwart it.

When this happens you will need to rely on your opinion of the situation. Are you doing all the things you can as a parent? Make sure that you are a positive role model. Remember, you have a significant influence on her.

Next, check out the school and your neighborhood. How have the children who grew up in this neighborhood fared when they grew up? Do they become productive adults or do most of the kids spend time in juvenile detention for most of their teenage years?

Take the time to talk with parents and teachers at school. Each school has a culture and perhaps your daughter is trying to fit into this culture. How concerned are the teachers? Does the behavior of most kids at the school improve as they grow up out their phases?

Unfortunately, you can't watch over every influence in your child's life. You also can't be 100% sure that your daughter will learn right from wrong. However, you can improve the odds of this. Your influence as a parent is great and you should be a positive role model for your child. - 30692

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Baby Bedding Sets - Learn About The Features

By Bee Fraley

With many types of baby bedding sets available it helps to know what to look for in one. These are sets that feature all sorts of items that are used to make a baby feel comfortable. In addition to these items some decorative things can work too.

The first things to find are the bedding sheets. Two types of these sheets are going to be used. A standard bed sheet and a fitted sheet for the mattress will. For these materials it helps to use cotton sheets. They will keep the baby warm and can handle moisture.

A quilt can work along with those two sheets too. A quilt can be a comfortable item for a baby but it helps to see what it is made with. For best results a quilt with both polyester and cotton should be chosen. The polyester is a necessity because it is very lightweight. The baby will feel comfortable because the quilt will not be too heavy.

Another part that might be included in the set is a crib skirt or dust ruffle. This is a good part of a set in that it can add to the appearance of the crib. It will also be able to cover any storage areas underneath the crib.

For the safety of the baby bumpers can be installed as a part of a bed set. Bumpers are cushioning items that are on the inside walls of the bed. They are placed along the bars. When the baby rolls into the walls the movements will be cushioned by these bumpers. This will help to keep the baby from being harmed as a result of the movements.

The use of a decorative pillow can be great to see in a bed set. It can be a good part of a set but it will need to have thick materials in it. With a thicker pillow the baby will not be able to lift it up. As a result the baby will not end up getting stuck under the pillow.

Many sets can come with their own diaper stackers. This is a material that works as a storage device for diapers, baby care products and toys. This part of the set can be designed with a pattern that matches the other items in the set.

The last thing you will have to decide on is the pattern or design of the set. A variety of different types of colors and themes are available for all parts of baby bedding sets. These include ones that feature different colors including blue, pink and white. There are many themes that work for boys or girls too. An animal or sports theme can work for boys while a castle or flower theme can work for girls.

Be sure to check and see how these pieces can work with a bed set for a baby. These pieces, including a quilt and sheets plus a safety bumper can be important. A diaper stacker can be convenient as well. With all of these parts it also helps to see what themes are available. - 30692

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Welcome to Fatherhood

By Damian Papworth

Congrats, you're going to be a father. It's definitely a huge, life changing event. If you haven't yet realized, changes are going to come. But that's nothing to be afraid of. Although, new responsibilities are at hand and you do have to care for a new life, it's an exciting time.

Fatherhood is definitely a life changing event. Many new fathers experience a rollercoaster ride of emotions-it's not just expectant mothers who are fraught with emotional highs and lows. There's the excitement of being dad, mixed with fear of not being a good enough parent, along with dread about the changes that will have to be made.

Being a brand new dad means that changes are in store; life as you knew it is over.

Of course, with these changes, there's a whole lot of anxieties too. No one is perfectly calm and collected when a new life is on the way. It's absolutely normal to experience these sorts of fears and worries. Psychologists actually say that the majority of men have concerns about becoming new fathers.

However, no matter how anxious or out of control you feel, the best solution is to attack these fears head on.

Some widespread fears that tend to plague new fathers and fathers to be include, money, health and life changes.

A somewhat chief problem or issue that tends to come about when a new baby is being brought into the home is money. Pocketbooks do get tighter with a new child. Most new parents will probably spend at least $10,000 in the first year alone.

Careful planning and tight budgeting are a necessity of preparing for a new child. You do have to make some concessions. You can live a more simple, less consumption oriented lifestyle. Keep in mind too that babies don't require all the latest toys or the newest clothes-all they really need is some TLC, tender, loving care.

Yet another topical worry or apprehension that many new fathers face concerns itself with health. Fathers and mothers are alike are worried about whether or not their child will born without any serious afflictions. A lot of things could go wrong. The question of what happens should your child suffer from an incurable disease or disorder is on every parent's mind. The facts should, however be more than reassuring; the overwhelming majority of children around 97% are born without any significant health concerns whatsoever. The only thing a parent needs to concentrate on is how to give the best love and care to their child. Positive thoughts are essential.

Yet another apprehension that tends to distress all new fathers and fathers to be is the fear of being an inadequate or bad parent. It is, of course, a very common fear. Yet, the mere fact of being worried simply reinforces the reality that you will be a good father. Caring goes a long way.

All that really matters when you boil it down is love. - 30692

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Baby Potty Training - 5 Reasons to Potty Train Your Baby Early

By Lily Adams

Although most children are potty trained around 2 or later, there is another option called baby potty training. It has its own benefits, but it may be hard for some families to do. This article will discuss 5 benefits of potty training your baby early.

1. Improves Baby-Bonding: Supporters of this method believe that infant potty training can bring you and your baby closer, though there has been no scientific study on the matter. A kind of communication is formed between the two of you that isn't usually there since it is necessary to be so closely tuned into your babies needs and signals.

2. More Comfort: Diaper rash is believed to cause an increase in crying and fussing. Since less diapers are used with this technique, your child will experience less troublesome rashes that can occur while wearing diapers.

3. Develops Independence: Diaperless babies are encouraged to crawl to a potty at an early age, which gives them a sense of independence that diapered babies do not experience. Instead the diapered babies are very dependent upon the parent to change their diaper over and over again.

4. Reduce Diaper Waste: Using disposable diapers leads to considerable waste in our landfills. By using cloth diapers, part of the solution is attained, yet this creates its own toll on the environment as it takes a lot of energy in order to launder them. Not only will baby potty training help reduce waste, but it can also be friendlier on your wallet.

5. Completely Natural: Mothers in Africa and Asia often carry their un-diapered infants around. They are able to do this without being soiled because they have become accustomed to reading the signs of their babies. While the technique of holding your baby away from you before being soiled won't work for most modern families, the same principles of reading your child's signs apply.

This article looked at 5 reasons to potty train your baby early. Not using diapers can encourage baby bonding, be more comfortable to the child, increase their independence and reduce diaper waste all at the same time and has been considered more natural.

This idea is greatly debated and is not well documented; if you are considering it you probably have more questions...

Do you need more information? - 30692

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